What doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right? Right??

It's been a rough weekend.  We were really excited when we made it to the end of our two week wait, unfortunately this month is a negative.  On top of that disappointment, we found out today that we have to put down a beloved friend, one of our Barb horses, Zydeco.  He broke his ankle on ice in the pasture and it wasn't fixable.  We're trying to gather ourselves and look to the next cycle and keep positive, though.  As I told Sheri earlier, it'll happen when it's meant to.

Just some thoughts

I've been very anxious today, the past few days really.  I hope that the test the 9th will finally be the one that turns up positive.  This process - nearly a year in the making - has taken a toll from both of us.  It's a toll we're both happy to pay, and will continue to pay for as long as it takes, but one that we feel nonetheless.  It never occurred to me, when I was in my early 20's and decided to do the right thing and wait until the right time, that doing the right thing might makes things a lot harder.  I think, though, that this will make us better parents ultimately.  We'll appreciate exactly what this child is to us, because we'll have fought tooth and nail for it to be brought into the world.  At least that's my hope.  Sheri and I both have our flaws and our issues, and while I hope that we can avoid our kid seeing the worst of them, the reality of it is that they probably will.  Will that make us bad parents?  Or just human?  What if we have a baby and we're both completely lost?  We've both had experience with raising or helping to raise other peoples' kids, but how will we fare with our own?  How will we handle the backlash when (if) our families raise issue with our interracial child?  How will we handle the people who will inevitably feel it's in their right to voice their negative opinion of our little family?  How will we prepare our kid to handle people's shit without us there to handle it for them?  I suppose that these are questions every potential or new parent asks themselves.  I know that Sheri and I love one another without question and that love will extend to our child, and that is the groundwork that everything else will be built upon.  We'll be fine.