We went to see the Reproductive Endocrinologist this weekend. I wish I could say it was a positive experience, but while she struggled to maintain professional politeness, I was left with a bad taste in my heart and my mouth. Basically the medical news was neutral. She wants to check to see if the prior procedures done left any scar tissue, if Sheri's good tube is still clear, if the fibroid in her uterine wall is causing any issues. If all that is good, we'll have our donor check his sperm count, motility, etc. If everything's good to go, she'll start S on the usual process of ultrasound monitoring to detect ovulation, triggering the surge if need be, and meds. On a human level, it was far from neutral. The doctor would barely look at me, insisted on calling our donor S's "sexual partner" and, when she did acknowledge verbally that we were lesbians, she lectured us profusely on the legal rights of the "father". Now, listing our donor as a sexual partner on paper is a good thing. It gives us leeway with the FDA regulations we wouldn't have otherwise. However, in a conference room with no recording devices present, just a three way conversation...ok, two and a half way...it was ridiculous and insulting for her to do so past explaining to us that if she listed him as such we would have more options should we need to inseminate in the clinic.
I have to say, I've grown pretty pessimistic about the whole getting pregnant situation. Very likely our only option to do so would be IVF. IVF is a route taken away from us because our insurance only allows it if you're using your HUSBAND'S sperm. My egg reserve is low, a hormone that is required for pregnancy is really low...Sheri's missing a fallopian tube, has age working against her...it just doesn't seem likely to happen. We can look into adoption all day long, but in reality, we don't have that kind of money up front and in large chunks throughout like they need it. Sheri doesn't want to give up, but I don't know if I can continue to pretend it's ever going to happen and keep myself from falling into severe depression whenever it doesn't. It's not as if we can just go ask a friend to let us knock her up, and that's really the only way I see that we'll ever have a kid.
